life lessons

got this from mommy JP:

In my life
the greatest handicap is my fear,
the most useless asset is my pride
the scariest thing to do is change
and the worst mistake is giving up

true... fear stops us from doing so many things. even saying things that should be said... there are different kinds of fear...fear of hurting others, fear of getting hurt, fear of overindulging and so many other fears.

following that, pride stems from fear of getting hurt or fear of admitting one was wrong. The worst things in my life happened because of pride. Dad's pride, personal pride, friends pride. Pride does just get in the way of everything. Sometimes we're too proud to admit that we did make a mistake and we're too proud to even apologize. Maybe that's why texting has been a convenience and a blessing for me. In a family full of pride and was brought up not being able to communicate with each other, the only way I can get a thank you, an i love you, or any form of acknowledgement is through text messages. Text messages that I have kept throughout the years. Text messages that I will never erase as long as i live.

We are all afraid of change. I do agree with Joy when she said that people refuse to acknowledge that they, themselves, change. I've been witness to that... with friends, loved ones, family, and myself. People are too afraid to admit that their feelings have changed already. People always blame others for changing because they know it feels better to do that than admit that they, themselves, have changed. Funny how in a world where the only constant is change, people are scared of that constant.

I have given up on a lot of people... but not without giving them chances. Close friends would know that I can be as loyal as a puppy, but i set limits as to how much i can forgive. I've done that because I want to get hurt anymore. I'm tired of getting hurt by people who take advantage of me and what I have.

I've grown up not trusting people because they've been proven to just use me... that's why I am very possessive of my friends and I set standards for them. Maybe that's why I'm not closing my doors on making new friends, but keeping the chain latch on.

***context switch***

today, i decided to created something new in the kitchen... just for kicks... everyone at home loved it... and it's quite simple to prepare... slices of toast topped with olive oil, sprinkled with grated parmesan and ground basil leaves. toast the bread for 2 and a half minutes, and you've got bread that's delicious :)

***context switch***

when I find time, i'll update people about my life... maybe about my opinion about government... maybe about the truth behind what people percieve me to be...

anyway...
just because i feast every now and then doesn't make me a glutton. it's just that you don't see my regular diet, you just see me feasting.